Moo! The Musings of a Plaid Cow

I got an email from buy.com today saying that the order I placed yesterday morning (with the free standard shipping option) had shipped. I checked the tracking number and found out that the package had already been delivered–before the email had even been sent. This is the second time in a row that free shipping has been next day making buy.com the “Best Place to Buy on the Internet” (and 10 times better than SheepShaver shipping).

The Massachusetts legislature has juts approved an constitutional amendment which will discriminate against a section of the population. Jim Crowe, the leader of the convention stated earlier in the day that this amendment will provide homosexuals all of the rights, benefits and privileges of marriage which leads me to one of two conclusions:

• He doesn’t have a clue what is meant by this statement, since marriage and civil unions are not equal under the law, or
• He actually opposes the amendment he wrote to support this inequality

The most likely next step for the Governor of Massachusetts is to ask the Supreme Court to deny the constitutional rights of residents because the constitution may be changed by the people in two more years, assuming that this exact same amendment passes next year’s legislature. It might be an interesting November.

I got to take off early on what seemed like the first day of spring (March 26th) and drive though the urban sprawl up to the beautiful city of Manchester, NH. It was a nice day and the license plates seemed to come out in support: “RHEMI”, “+MYGUY”, “RM2PLA”, “DETAILR”, “-TRIP-” and “DNTBGME”. (The last could be don’t big me, but somehow I don’t think so.)

One of favorite people in the world has got a new license plate: “SHO-OFF”. Let’s see if his mad parking skillz improve.

These Bumper Stickers I saw a while back were poignant (though they may or may not express my particular political beliefs):

• GWB: The President Quayle We Never Had
• Like a re-run of a bad movie: A Bush, A War, A Recession

I couldn’t make out “GNFLYN” until I realized that the license plat cover mentioned Hang Gliding.

And I want to know what “GOOD HUE” is doing on a silver car. Isn’t that close enough to white, which is almost not a color?

I am currently starting to look for links which I hope can explain the methods behind the madness which New Hampshire residents drive. As an example: I can only assume that the intersection leaving my apartment complex is different than every other one in that the left turn has right of way over the right hand turn. I’ve almost been hit and had driver roll down their windows to yell at me after I made a right turn on a green light. Amazing.

Some license plates are simple, like “BIKING”, “HYPHEN” and “SPANKI”. Others are complex, like “DPCDIVER” (Deep Sea Diver), “G8TRB8″ (Gator Bait), and “-IAMME-”. And some I just don’t get, but look like they belonged on the great game show Bumper Stumpers. If you know what these mean, please let me know: “STRFRE”, “CUTIGR”, “BULLYCL”, “MDCRAB”, “ELUNICO”

The rest are just cool so I have to talk about them. Like “FA-18″ which flew by me on Route 3 one day. My bosses boss has the plate “MAUS” (Mouse), which was has been his nickname for a long time and has nothing to do with the books of the same name. My wife saw a new car with the license plate “HOOPTIE” which was apparently trying to live up to it’s name as it was barely attached to the bumper. I also saw “ILVPGS” which was fine. I just hope the next wooly I see doesn’t have one saying “ILVSHEP”.

Update:
Apparently it has to do with delayed signals. (Many of the street lights here are on a delayed signal so that you can turn left because the oncoming traffic has a red light…there’s just no real way to tell.

When you start looking for them, good license plates how up even more readily. I met “RDBERD” when I was going to the mall and parked next to a “NAUTTI” girl. (I don’t want to think about a guy having that plate.)

Some people use force to get what they want (ie, “GRAPLR”), while others are just polite. “XQQE-ME”.

Other cars just belong together: “INTENCE” “SONBEAM”.

I just poured a can of Red Bull into a clear glass and realized why people always drink it out of a can: it looks like I just pissed in the glass. Very appetizing.

With all of the mini-vans running around on the roads up here, I’m surprised that I haven’t seen the license plate “SOCAMOM” yet. I know it must exist somewhere, even if it is owned by a husband not in jail.

The license plate “SKEETR” reminded me of our last trip though Pennsylvania. The country station Froggy has a personality called Skeeter. Their morning drive time crew has personalities including McFly and Doc (of Doc Hopper’s French-Fried Frog Legs fame, perhaps).

The interesting license plate was “W8TN4U”. Perhaps it was Bryan Adams who was right there. Or perhaps friends of Godot.

According to a report yesterday, Breyers is recalling some cartons of Peanut Butter Cup Ice Cream–because they may contain peanuts, which are not on the label. Who reads the nutritional information but skips the title of the product?

When talking about the wages lost to corporate america in NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament pools, one news anchor was telling the other about a basketball: “You don’t know whether it’s blown up or stuffed–you can’t do these pools.”